Armageddon upon us?

Reflecting on the "apocalypse" prophecies that abounded for the end of 2012 makes me consider some things. Perhaps the Mayans were not so far off. It seems, sadly, that an Armageddon is, in fact, upon us, but not due to any external or natural forces but because of our own sick, twisted, and ego - clinging culture.

There has been much talk and debate over gun control and the treatment of mental health since the tragedy in Newtown, Connecticut. Also talk of school and personal security and our basic rights.

The Secretary of the State of Arizona, the villainous Tom Horne, proposed an "armed educator" plan, whereby at least one staff member in every school would be expected, or required to be "packing heat".

As a parent, and a former teacher, I am appalled by this proposal for many reasons. First and foremost, what kind of lesson does it model for our children? As educators, we are expected to model and instill life lessons to our students, which include communication as an alternative to violence as a problem solving skills. How can we do that, in good faith, if schools themselves do not adhere to this policy?

Also, having weapons in close proximity to kids, all the time, is a recipe for disaster. What if little Johnny is really getting on Ms. Crabapple's already frayed nerves and she just loses it? Or a violent altercation starts up between kids, or groups of kids. Perhaps firing a warning shot might restore the peace!

And consider the temptation for the more mischievous students, particularly in middle or high school, if they know there is a gun around. The implications are terrifying.

What is perhaps more disturbing to me, as a human being, is that according to a poll I saw on the evening news, 83% of those who responded were in favor of such a proposal!

I agree that this shooting was horrific, and that kids deserve protection. But they deserve our best ideas, not more guns, which will only fuel the fire even further. Of course, this comes from the same state that brought us - and vehemently defends - SB 1070, a piece of legislation intended to promote fear, distrust, divisiveness, and racism. 

Arizona is rapidly becoming a police state, where reason and compassion are swept away in favor of fear mongering and mistrust. The penal system, as I have written of extensively, is but one aspect. Recently, a list of "banned books" was distributed to the state complexes. Along with books that may contain graphic erotica, included are many books on drawing (i.e., teaching yourself to draw), books on carpentry, plumbing, and electrician skills, books that criticize or give information on the prison system, books on homeopathic and natural medicine, books on the Mayans and the Aztec, books on calligraphy, and a huge array of other equally dumbfounding subjects. "A Game of Thrones", Dean Koontz "Frankenstein" (book two only), "No Country For Old Men" and "Shutter Island" which are both on TV regularly, and more than 1000 others. Not only does the department of corrections do little to assist in rehabilitation, they seem to be actively opposed to it. I can see the logic behind many of the books on the list, but 75% or more have me scratching my head.

Many inmates, disgruntled or even terrified of the state policies, have attempted to apply for interstate compacts upon release - to live with family outside of the state. All that I have spoken with have been denied. Once this penal system gets its hooks in you, it does not let go. I wonder if this happens in other states?

The Federal government also exhibits this lack of reason and compassion. The whole " fiscal cliff" debacle illustrates how politicians are removed from the wants and needs of the people. The posturing and bickering has little to do with the common good and much to do with individual agendas and reputations.

My faith in humanity is taking a huge beating as I stop and look around this crazy country. I am but one person (barely even that as a convict), and my voice is just a squeak compared to the Niagara Falls-like roar of tyranny and injustice. Can't we do better than this?

The soapbox is now yours....

Kick 'em when they're down

I wanted to share with my readers a couple of very real, very specific examples of the irrationality and some negative consequences of the current system of sex offender registration.

A good friend of mine from in here (meaning one you can talk to openly and honestly about things) was just released.  That's great!  Wonderful for him!  But the circumstances surrounding his release demonstrate the commonplace atrocities of civil liberty, justice, and dignity.

Robert was incarcerated on a nonsexual offense.  Because he had a sexual offense on his record, from many years ago, he was housed in an SO yard, for his own safety.  Because Robert's earlier offense was prior to the SO registration requirement, he was told that he would not have to register as a sex offender on release.  He arranged for a place to live, and everything was "hunky dory".

Then, about a week and a half before his release, he was informed that he would indeed have to register as a sex offender, contrary to all of the information he received and all of the agreements and contracts he had already signed.

As a sex offender, he was then ineligible for the housing that had been approved.  In Arizona, and many other states, sex offenders have limited options for "acceptable" housing.  It was too late to make any other arrangements, so he was to be released as homeless!

This meant, in spite of his low level risk level, he would have to wear an ankle monitor and stay on his "assigned" street corner for at least eight consecutive hours each night.  Leaving this area could result in parole violation and a return trip to a "correctional" facility.  He left here terrified, confused, and frustrated.

To make matters worse, Robert has several health issues, not the least of which is a tendency toward seizures.  He had no idea what, if any, resources would be available in a health emergency.  As Robert had no money, a group of inmate friends and fellow Buddhists loaded him up with supplies including granola bars, peanut butter, and other resources.  This alleviated one concern, but not several others.  I ask myself who are the bigger monsters in this scenario.

Now, I know that Robert is very unlikely to pose any threat to the community at large.  These inane practices are supposedly enforced for the protection of society.  But the big question I have is if someone were truly a threat, would you want them homeless on a street corner?  Wouldn't some kind of halfway house, with supervision, be much more logical?  An ankle monitor would do little good if someone decided to attack a passing citizen.  This is how the system protects society?

My second example is from some newspaper articles and information from the RSOL Newsletters that I get, that I recently read.  There are several private web sites " not affiliated with police" that are extorting people on the sex offender registration.  They scan police databases and then do additional research on these offenders, and then list this information on their sites.  Included are links to the social media not only of the offender but their "friends" as well as information and addresses on their family members.  Some of these "offenders" are either listed mistakenly or no longer must register with the police.  If a listed person or family member contacts the web site to be removed, they are instructed to pay $79.00 for an "investigation".  If they contact the site again (after nothing is done to remove them) they are told they must pay $499 as a removal fee.

As if these people have not already experienced enough suffering, humility, and abuse.  Again, I remind you that many sex offenders have offenses where no human has been touched at all, contrary to general perception.  There have been lawsuits against these web sites proprietors, but little has been accomplished thus far.

I share the stories with you to generate awareness of some of the realities of this whole campaign against "sex offenders" that is so prevalent in our media and culture.  I do not condone the actions of these offenders, nor my own crimes in this regard.  But society, as well as the legal system, must not only recognize that the "one size fits all" approach of condemnation and oppression does not reflect the reality of the diverse individuals or the incredible degree of differences in their transgressions, but also does nothing in addressing the causes of these crimes or assist in any meaningful rehabilitation thereof.

A new approach is needed for the overall safety of, and benefit to: society, the perpetrators, and their friends and families.

Inefficiency, indifference, and apathy

The title of this piece sums up the general policies and procedures of the overall system of the department of corrections.  I have written about some examples of this in previous posts, and I'd like to add some more.

I was recently notified that I was to receive a legal call at 9:00 AM in the counselor's office of my building.  So, of course, I had to take the day off work, since I work on another unit.  At about 8:15 AM I noticed that the counselor was not in.  This in itself is not uncommon, so I asked the officers on duty in my run how I was to receive this call.  They suggested I check with a counselor in another building to make arrangements.

So I made the rounds to the other three buildings on my side of the yard - no counselors were in.  I returned and explained to the COs on duty.  They contacted a CO3 on the other side of the yard who said he would handle it.

So I wandered up to the gate between yards.  I waited over 15 minutes and nobody came to unlock the gate.  I noticed a counselor head into one of the buildings on my side, so I went over to explain the situation.  He radioed the co3 (on the other side) and then told me to go back to the gate and he would let me through.  I waited another 10 minutes before a passing cop open the gate for me.

Of course there is another gate to get to his office.  I waited there another 15 minutes.  Another CO passed by and I explained that my call was already past due.  He again radioed the CO3, who came out of his office to unlock the gate.

But here's the real issue.  He then looks at me and asks why I waited until the last minute to come to his office!  I really wanted to punch and in the nose!  I kept my cool, thanks to my Buddhist practice.  As it turned out, I missed the call - but miraculously the attorney called back.

This practice of blaming the inmate for the ineffectiveness of staff is ever so common.

Another brilliant example of the department of confusion has to do with the bus ride to the SMU unit where I work.  Every day there are two buses that take employees to SMU.  And every day there is some problem with something.  Paperwork missing, copies not made, workers not on the list, extra people on the bus, not enough people on the bus, or something else.  It often takes up to an hour to go the 1 mile to the SMU unit.

And that's just once we get on the bus.  The bus itself is supposed to arrive around 7:00 AM, however that time actually ranges from 6:30 AM to 9:45 AM.  We are not notified when the bus will arrive, but are expected to be there when it does.  Every worker has a radio, but somehow they are unable (or unwilling) to convey such information.

The primary attitude is that we are a bunch of lying, cheating, immoral, monstrous, evil criminals, so why bother to worry about efficiency.  This is certainly not true of every employee, but it's the general principle guiding procedures.  I acknowledge that security is of the essence in an environment like this, but when something is done multiple times every day, the process should become routine.  The only thing routine here is inconsistency.

Similar inconsistencies abound in the process of returning to our "home" from work.  Some days we get stripped once, sometimes twice, once it was three times, and - rarely - not at all.  And the strip-outs themselves range from, "drop the oranges (pants) and shake out the whites (boxers)" to taking off everything, nuts squeezed, bending over, spreading our cheeks and coughing.

One never knows what the procedure will be, yet the officers will consistently say "you know the drill." What?  Which one?  It's different every day!  Then they will berate as for not knowing the "routine".  "How long have you been doing this?" Is a common question, spoken like we are idiots for not knowing what is expected.

My final example of the day is less of ineffectiveness than it is structured nonsense.  When we arrive on the yard, we are issued one pair of pants, three T shirts, three pairs of boxer shorts, two pairs of socks, and some "lame-o" deck shoes for clothing.  OK, so far so good.  Laundry is to be turned in once a week, and we get it back the next day.  Okay fine.

Then it is against policy to do any laundry in the run, it's not allowed.  Yet many of the inmates here have no money at all, so have no other clothing than what is issued.  Two pairs of socks to last a week, and what about one pair of pants?  How can it be cleaned?

In truth even the indigent inmates will eventually get extra clothing one way or another.  The socks that are sold through the store become holier than the Pope in a month (they are not of the best quality).  The reason I bring up socks is that I got "scolded" the other day for having socks hanging to dry in my area.  I have only three pairs that do not look like Swiss cheese.  Now, I do have a job, so I can buy socks from the store.  Three hours of work for one pair of socks.  And I did...  More than one month ago!  But I have yet to receive them and, as the "property office" is never open when I am not at work.  I could take a day off in which I would miss out on $3.20 pay.  And while it may not seem like much, it would be another 2 1/2 pairs of socks!

Again to be fair, most of the officers never say anything about laundry, unless a captain, sergeant, or warden is in the vicinity, but some seem to revel in bitching, writing tickets, and finding anything they can to cause us suffering.

I often wonder if all this is apathy, ignorance, or a calculated effort to keep us off balance in everything that we do.  I suppose it's probably all of the above: whatever the reason, it successfully keeps us frustrated and confused.

Why I Wonder Why

A friend in here was recently giving me some feedback on my essays.  He told me that as a reader, he would like to see me get past and the "why" that permeates my thoughts and musings.

I gave a sort of laugh and said that, as a human, I would really like to get past though "why" myself, but I'm obviously far from that point.

We talked about how it's really one of the big challenges in this place.  The inability to really understand, and the acceptance of the reality that I may never find answers to the questions that torture me perennially.  Also to acknowledge that it makes little difference to the situation at hand.

There are a myriad of reasons as to why this is such a challenge.  For one thing there is the inability to "move on" to something new.  Everything around is a perpetual reminder of the circumstances that led to this incarceration.  My brother, who is coming off of a tough divorce, talks about the things he can do to "clear his head".  He goes to drumming groups, goes for hikes, takes little vacations, and can see a therapist.  He is talking about maybe trying to "get back on the horse" and perhaps make efforts to date again.  These are not options for me.

Then there is the incredible timelessness of this place.  Because there are no significant or new events or experiences in my life, time has stood still.  It seems as if my time with Jess was just yesterday.  In my mind she's perennially pregnant with our son though he's approaching a year and a half.

The incredibly wonderful feelings I had of being with her and the laughs and joys we shared are still crystal clear in my mind, as is the devastating sense of heartbreak, loss, and betrayal.  "Time heals all wounds," but when nothing is happening, time stands still.  The intervening time does not really exist.

Perhaps due to the nature of my personality, I also have an overwhelming compulsion to make sense of things.  I want to see a reason, rationality, or logic in her actions.  I naively want to think that logic and reason are absolutes that we all share; that the notions of right and wrong, good and bad, cause and effect and even the degrees of those attributes are universal.  This is clearly not the case.

Though when it comes to the operation, organization, and policy of this department of corrections, I am fully aware that logic and reason have little influence.  Paradoxically, I can accept and even laugh at this in spite of the frustrations of living it.  That's not the case when it comes to Jess's  actions.  Nor of my own for that matter.  There's nothing remotely amusing about it.  I can accept the bias and sterility of the legal system and even that of the general public, but I struggle with this when it comes to the woman I love, who I planned on spending my life with.

I realize that love greatly interferes with a clarity of reason and logic.  I understand that love is precisely why it's so hard to deal with it all.  Perhaps love also has something to do with those choices and actions of Jess.  Perhaps, also, I'll never know.

 

Part One:  Intention and Perspective

                I got fired from my job the other day.  I gave one of the maximum security inmates a hit from my cigarette through the cage he was in.  Tobacco is contraband for these inmates, though not for us, so I was "furnishing contraband to an inmate," which is considered a major offense.  What I see as a random act of kindness, is seen by an administration as a conspiracy to incite subversive behavior.  It's all in one's perspective I suppose.

                So I later spoke to the officer in charge of employment, to see about getting another job, but she was less than sympathetic.  "What were you thinking?" ere her exact words.

                Indeed, what was I thinking.  Well, in retrospect the rapid succession of thought that I had at that very moment was something along the lines of this:

                He asked me if I had an extra smoke.  I was cautious, even a bit frightened at first, and said I did not (which was untrue).  He might very well be a murderer, child molester, or some equally heinous type of thug.  Then, he asked if he could have a hit from mine.

                Then I thought, he's another inmate, like me.  He made some poor choices, some mistakes, much like myself.  Perhaps there were extenuating circumstances that nobody believed or even acknowledged.  He may have been in the wrong place at the wrong time, as happens to everyone at one time or another.

                Then I thought how he, as a maximum security inmate, was one of the few people on this planet who had it worse than me.  Nearly 24/7 lockdown, no windows, no natural light, less respect from the officers then even on my yard and far fewer "goodies" than the few we are allowed.

                Then I realized that I was still applying labels.  I was caught up in the same mindset of so many others.  Quite simply, he was a fellow human being, imperfect as we all are, and as such, why not give the guy a drag.  So I passed it through the cage, he took an appreciative drag, it in handed it back and said "thanks".

                The yard captain came around the corner at that very moment and shouted at me not to bother coming back to work tomorrow.  So I have an unexpected "hiatus".  I'm sad I lost my job, as I liked it.  I'm not sad to avoid the multiple strip searches every day and the hours of waiting each week.  I can't, however, regret the piece of my humanity, the compassion, and empathy that led to my "transgression".

                Back to the idea of perspective.  In reality, this truly was a random act of kindness while simultaneously being a subversive and inappropriate action.  It all depends on how you choose to view it.  This illustrates one of the inherent and fundamental problems in the legal system.  In prison, we are discouraged from kindness and compassion by both the institution as well as prevailing prison culture.  And these "opposing" forces are in continued conflict that spirals ever downward.

                In the court system, the emphasis is only on the mistakes that people made, oftentimes dangerous, destructive, and even psychotic, yet they are only a part of our humanity and do not define us completely.  In truth, most are foolish lapses of judgment, often created by adversity, struggle, and ignorance.  Addiction, poverty, lack of education, lack of guidance, and desperation are undoubtedly the leading influences to criminal behavior.  Yet we treat the symptom rather than the cause.

                Then there's the media, which continually sensationalizes the "horror" and tends to skimp on the full story, which perpetuates a climate of fear, segregation, and alienation of the "criminal element" of society.

                I realize that people need security and protection, though I sometimes wonder who we need protection from.  As I gaze down on the run around me, it doesn't seem to be these people.  Is it the guy with whom I shared a cigarette?  I don't know, I don't know him, I couldn't really even see his face well through the cage.  I do know that after I was admonished by the captain, he shouted out to me "Hey man, I'm sorry about that, that was my bad". But it wasn't his bad, it was my good, and I will continue to hold that thought in spite of the attempts to wear down my humanity.

               

Part Two: Humane Solutions

                It was brought to my attention that while I often point out the flaws and foibles of the legal system, I rarely offer up a solution.  Yeah, I know; bitching about things is easy and it's a very complex situation which has a direct causality to the safety and security of society as a whole.  So I realize the gravity of this issue.

                I will present some possible suggestions that could improve the system.  I am not a policymaker, nor do I understand the complexities of budget manipulation.  Though, generally speaking, these ideas would probably save millions in tax dollars in the long run.

                First, I look at the state penitentiary system.  Quite simply, one idea is to replace the prevailing culture of dehumanization and suspicion to one of mutual respect and true rehabilitation. The training of correctional officers could be expanded to include such phrases as "please" and "thank you" when "ordering" us about.  An officer once told me, and I swear I'm not making this up, that in training they are taught to assume that anything an inmate says is a lie.  This is not a path to respect, correction, or rehabilitation. The inmates should also be instructed on the values of mutual respect and politeness.  While there will always be those, on both sides, that will be hard to get through to, most people will be respectful and accommodating when they are treated with respect.  It should be the rule rather than the exception - from both groups. And it must start with administration, as they should set the example.

                Real therapy, counseling, and support groups are absolutely a necessity to rehabilitation.  There are many intelligent, specialized, and even professional inmates in the system that much of this could be done by inmates, especially with incentive programs.  And as a culture of mutual respect develops, it would become easier to establish such programs.

                Also, an encouragement of education and exploration in the arts seems to be essential to healing, growing and above all creating self respect.  Art, music, drama, sculpture, and so on should not be discouraged or prohibited, but should be offered, encouraged, and taught.  Again, much of this could be done by inmates themselves.  There are extremely limited opportunities offered here at present along those lines.  Resources could come, at least in part, from inmates and scholarships and grants could also supplement this.  Perhaps partnerships with arts councils or other organizations could be established and they could identify potential talents and even recoup these investments by selling or saving the work.  Some states have similar arrangements.  A sense of purpose and self worth is absolutely essential to meaningful rehabilitation.

                As far as the court system goes, it seems that GPS and monitoring could be better utilized in the many situations where a perpetrator has no history of violence, like first time offenders, if there is no victim, no aggression and/or no predation.  It seems this would be far cheaper than paying for food, shelter, clothing and Medical Care for thousands and thousands of individuals.  This would greatly relieve the financial burden of those left behind, assuming the convict can secure employment though a shift in societal perspective seems necessary to have success in this area.

                Admittedly, the trick is effective and objective measures toward potential danger, but as I mentioned in previous posts, I went through an extensive psychological evaluation that was pretty much ignored. Judges could be far more creative in assigning sentences that truly address the issues of the defendant, like mandatory social work, volunteerism, court ordered treatment, and restitution toward victims both financial, and if applicable, in other ways as well.  Many in here have court ordered restitution, but this has little meaning when you are incarcerated for years, and if you're able to work, you make 35¢ per hour.

                Perhaps felonious co-ops might have a place in this brave new world of real and effective justice.  It doesn't seem impossible.  I'm not suggesting the expectation that felons around the country will suddenly all join hands and start singing "Kumbaya".  I'm saying there are better ways to deal with crime and criminals.

                This country has a significantly higher percentage of our population behind bars and any other in the world.  In fact, I read that the number of incarcerated Americans exceeds that of all other countries combined!  Why is this so?  Are we more immoral?  More criminally inclined?  I doubt it.  What are other countries or other states doing that are working?  These are things to explore.  Is there a Justice Committee in the House or in the Senate?  If so, what do they do?  If not, why not?

                Finally, how do you change the mindset of the entire country's preconceived notions of crime and criminals?  The media has much to do with this.  How do you curtail their sensationalism and fear mongering without limiting freedom of speech?  What about more balanced reporting?  What about prohibiting media coverage until after a case is decided?  After all, isn't everything before that conjecture?  Innocent until proven guilty has little credit in the news reporting, and does that not influence the supposed impartiality of the justice system?  It has been repeatedly suggested to me that I got more time than most in here, with similar charges, because I was a teacher and because there was media coverage.  How is that an impartial justice based on equality?

                Perhaps the media could give equal treatment to the causes of subversive behavior rather than sensationalizing the threats they pose.  Nowhere is this more evident than the exaggeration of "sex offenders".  Are there really more child abductors, kidnappers, and child molesters lurking behind every bush now then there were 20, 30, or 40 years ago?  When I grew up, this was not really a concern.  Is society that different now, or have we been programmed to believe so?  Does the influence of media actually encourage such deviance, creating self-fulfilling prophecies?  Or if we really are so different now, why is that so?  This is the real story.

                Again, perhaps looking at media and news in other countries might give us insight.  It seems in most other nations, news is more about news without the hype, conjecture, and melodrama. These are but a few ideas toward a newer and more effective way of dealing with crime in society.  As always, I welcome any suggestions, criticism, feedback, or additional ideas that you may have.  Perhaps an improvement is really possible.

Power Of The Prosecutor

This essay was commissioned by a friend, who shared with me an article from Huffington Post.  The article deals with the incredible power that prosecutors have in today's justice system.  This article does not address the situation in context to sex offenses, which correspond to the claims of the author perhaps even more glaringly than his own assertions.  The full article can be found at www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/01/16/the-power-of-the-prosecutor.

As I have mentioned in other essays, the prosecutors in the legal system have an inordinate amount of power and very few checks as to the abuse and manipulation of that power. The author, Radly Balko, addresses some of these and I'd like to illustrate how they fit into sex offense cases.

"There are too many laws... It is nearly impossible for layperson to keep track of all the laws that are created and modified in any given year."  The civil libertarian and defense Atty. Harvey Silvergate has argued that most Americans know unknowingly commit about three felonies per day." This is obviously a frightening statistic, and in the case of "sex crimes" they are added and modified continuously.

For example, ARS13-3553. the statute under which I was convicted, does not have any exceptions for exemptions built into it.  This means that my ex fiancée who viewed and transported the images in question to the police as well as the police, and the justice system personnel that exhibited these images, are guilty of the same crime than I am.  The power or willingness to enforce or prosecute this law seems to be an arbitrary decision based on the whims of law enforcement and justice system personnel.  I do not wish to imply that Jess, or the police should be charged, but the fact is that they could be and have violated the statute for which I am serving time.

Prosecutors are also protected by immunity that "shields them from liability, no matter how egregious their mistakes." How does this provide a truly objective system?  In Arizona at least, a judge will nearly always rely on the prosecution's case without any investigation to the claims.  Defense attorneys, especially public defenders, will not bother to investigate either, leaving the prosecutor free to embellish, manipulate, and even break the rules of the justice system.

As Balko states, "the prosecutor's job is no longer about enforcing the laws, but about choosing which laws to enforce."

"The laws are vaguely and broadly written."  This is evidenced by the previous scenario regarding ARS13-3553.  Also, the law includes: recording, filming, photographing, duplicating, developing, distributing, transporting, exhibiting, receiving, selling, purchasing, electronically transmitting, possessing, or exchanging in any visual depiction in which a minor is engaged in exploitive exhibition or other sexual conduct." In other words viewing an image is viewed with the same severity as actually taking pictures with intent to distribute.  The question of intent is completely absent from the equation.

In fact, in Arizona, a conviction for child molestation only requires proof of "knowingly and intentionally touching the genitals [of a child]." This may appear straightforward, but the state need not prove sexual intent or motivation.  Yet without sexual intent, the innocent actions perform daily by doctors, parents, child care workers, and others become repugnant actions of the predator needing to be punished.  Is not the annual "hernia check" performed in our school days the "intentional touching of the genitals"?  Dr. and gynecological visits, parental medical administrations, and a number of other acts are not exempt by this definition.  I know of at least one inmate serving a life sentence for an innocent actions such as this.  A life sentence with no need to question whether this contact was sexually motivated.

It is also well known that by and large, for prosecutors the justice system is a numbers game.  Elections, promotions, and appointments are based on racking up high numbers of conditions.  There is really no praise or incentive for declining to prosecute in the interests of justice.  I'm sure there are prosecutors, and defense lawyers who are guided by ethical standards, but politics often takes a greater role in the system.

Plea bargains, which were intended to reduce the burdens placed on the horrendously overstretched court system, are seen by some as a tool that lets guilty people off with lighter punishment than they deserve.  In reality however, they are being used as a tool of manipulation by the prosecution.  Multiple charges are often stacked, creating a terrifying prospect to defendants to take a plea.  In my situation I was looking at 100 - 300 years if I'd been found guilty on all charges, for possessing pictures that I had downloaded unseen, many of which had long been deleted.  I'm not defending my acts, but life in prison for this seems kind of extreme.  So I took a plea, not realizing the degree to which I was forfeiting my rights of due process in terms of seeking post conviction relief.  This type of scenario is by far the norm of this yard.  I know of several inmates who claim to be innocent, that took a plea of guilt because the implications of a wrongful conviction were too staggering to comprehend.

The Post article refers to "bringing the hammer down" as a method of intimidation and a showing of brute force.  I, thankfully, was spared the humiliation of SWAT teams busting into my home "guns a-blazin' " but many of my fellow inmates were not.  Most of these "dangerous felons" are rather meek and "nerdy" computer geeks - who might have relied on computer "fantasy" to compensate for an insecurity in human relations.  Yet teams of gun toting law enforcers would burst into their homes and drag them out and cuffs.  I mean, really?  Is this truly necessary or productive in any way to them, the families, or even to taxpayer dollars?  It's a display of might.

We also saw how post 9/11 a whole host of laws were enacted to protect ourselves from the tyranny of terrorism.  Yet again many of these laws could be used to limit our own rights to free speech and are vague and controversial.  Computer monitoring has resulted in a huge spike in convictions of internet-related sex crimes.  Again, not to condone these activities, but is that the intention of these restrictions to privacy?

The notion that "criminality is influenced by politics" is at its most evident in the sensationalism of prosecuting sex crimes.  How often is "tonight's top story" about illegal porn,  allegations of inappropriate behavior, or some kind of sex scandal?  It's a great strategy to rally and stir up the population at large, but the long-term effects on individuals, their families, and society as a whole is both underplayed an overlooked.  Very few of the monstrous and villainous sex offenders with whom I am incarcerated are truly a danger to society at large, and I imagine the same is true in the general population as well, but the prosecutors of this nation are not interested in such triviality.

Comparisons and Contrast

 

I just finished reading a couple books relating to the Arizona Dept of Corrections.  The first was "Wilderness and Razor Wire" by Ken Lamberton.  He was a teacher in Tucson who was arrested for a sex crime that landed him in prison for 12 years.  The second was "Crossing The Yard" by Richard Shelton, who served as a volunteer teaching creative writing workshops in the Arizona prison system for some 30 years.  Ironically, Lamberton was one of his students.  So obviously, I did some reflecting on the similarities and differences to my own situation and also pondered their thoughts and observations.

I'll start with Lamberton.  Obviously, the whole situation is similar to my own.  His crime was also heavily publicized by the media, and he's gone through many similar experiences as an" ex teacher sex offender." Like myself, he has a strong connection to nature, and much of this book is about plants and animals he observed in his Tucson prison yard.  Obviously, we both have a strong desire to write as an "escape" from confinement.

Lamberton also has a similar outlook on prison to my own.  He writes about " easy time" vs " hard time".  Easy time is retreating from emotions and connections as well as ignoring or resisting one's personal responsibility for one's actions.  Hard time is staring it straight in the face and not blaming others, or the state, as many tend to do.  I acknowledge my tendency to do that at times, though I am questioning policies and attitudes of the system, rather than it being the state's fault that I'm here.  Lamberton and Shelton both share my sentiments on the nonexistent notion of correction or rehabilitation.

Lamberton writes: "It is the difference between discipline and punishment: one looks forward and works toward restoration and health, the other looks backward and tears down, dehumanizes, destroys." It's clear to us both which method the ADC subscribes to.

Shelton, as an observer outside of confinement, had this to say: "it made me increasingly aware of how little the department of corrections cared about programs, rehabilitation, or any of the other fine phrases that were still part of their public rhetoric...  I was reminded, if I hadn't learned the lesson earlier at Florence, that  as far as the department of corrections was concerned, volunteers were shit and educational programs, even those bring their own funding and making the prison look good, were of no importance.  The fewer of them the better."

There are also some big differences between Lamberton's situation and my own.  He had an affair with a 14 year old student, in fact they ran away together.  I never acted on my inappropriate attractions, other than to download pictures.  Another difference, very painful to me, is that not only did his wife not turn him into the police (he was identified by an acquaintance in Colorado), she stayed with him and studied law and worked with the lawyers to get him out after eight years.  She ended up getting hired as a paralegal with the firm she was working with.

Incredibly though, after 18 months of being out, the Arizona Court of Appeals reversed the lower court's decision and he had to return to prison for four more years.

Then, there are situational differences that clearly illustrate the direction of the ADC.  Lamberton wrote about the inmate park and a visitor park, both full of plants and the occasional wildlife.  He caught toads with his kids in visitation.  He wrote about sitting under a tree, playing his guitar, and the 75 pound packages of food that were sent to inmates by their families at holiday time.  There is nothing like this in my incarceration.  I was envious of his "posh" situation.

Then later in the book, as time passes, the trees, plants, and flowers get torn up and the "Parks" get shut down.  The Food Care packages are prohibited, and eventually all sex offenders are declared to be a predatory security threat and cannot go "below" medium security yards.

For a short time he was in my complex, but managed, with the help of his wife, to get shipped back to Tucson, an option no longer available to sex offenders.

I think it might even be worse to have those privileges and lose them, though that DOC continues to chip away at the few privileges that remain.  The all day "food visits" were recently limited to 4 hours.  The list of "acceptable" books and magazines are shrinking exponentially and lock downs and strip searches are more numerous and more thorough.

I realize, of course, there's no purpose in comparing my situation to anyone else's.  Each is unique.  Lamberton's wife is certainly not Jess.  That I think my actions were far less directed toward her or anyone is irrelevant.  Did I hurt her any less?  My situation is my own, and it matters little what I believe about it.

I do get some satisfaction in knowing that both Lamberton and Shelton have made similar observations to my own.  Especially as Shelton was not an inmate, it adds a bit more credibility to my own sentiments that he is not merely whining about his own predicament.  Shelton ends his book with some powerful ideas and suggestions toward the prison system as an entity.

" Over the years, I have grown old while the system spins more and more rapidly out of control, an industry that depends for its energy on the processing of living bodies." He dryly quips about how the "product" of the penal system is a rare recyclable product, and that true treatment programs would reduce the recyclable nature of the product, which is not in the interest of the industry.

He notes, and I wholeheartedly concur, that a fraction of the number of inmates could and should be incarcerated - but in a secure mental hospital, as there are those who are criminally insane and dangerous to society.  But that the majority are neither.

Shelton advocates for people to step up and volunteer at local prisons, to see the real story behind the walls and fences.  Though the institution will resist any attempts at transparency, nevertheless, it's promising to read intelligent published literature on this topic; I thought I'd better grab these books before they are banned as well.

I encourage you to read them and other resources that are based on direct observation or objective data as opposed to media sensationalism or fear mongering political agendas.  Someday, that could be you or someone you love.

The New Year Rants Trilogy

Part I - Asinine Antics

Happy Freakin' New Year

As a new calendar year rolls in, I have the auspicious omen of being on lockdown. Well, at least that excuses me of my resolution to do more running, at least for now. So I figured that I'd spend at least part of the day writing about some of the inane practices and policies of the Arizona Dept of Corrections (ADC).

Recently, the head honcho and big cheese, the "state warden" took a tour of our facility. It seems that he was both astonished and outraged at the amount of "stuff" that we inmates possessed. Apparently he was upset with us about they're being the possessions of two humans crammed into a space originally designed for one. Shame on us.

So as an extremely relevant, appropriate, and logical response to our wicked behavior, the ADC created an initiative that restricts the number of religious books we may possess and notified us of the enforcement of the already existing policy of four boxes per inmate.

OK, so each inmate has the theoretical limit of 10 personal books, excluding books of a religious nature, which was essentially unlimited. It might have had something to do with that bill of rights thingy in the constitution.

Anyway, the new initiative essentially includes religious books in the limit of 10. So where does one begin to question the logic of such a move? On a practical level, I know of very few inmates to actually have the full four boxes allowed. I have only two. And there are no limits to the number of packages of refried beans or any number of food items that we may possess, so this makes very little sense as a "space saving" measure.

Then of course there is the "rehabilitative" aspect of such a policy. As already mentioned, there are few efforts or resources directed toward any growth, recovery or rehabilitation of the inmates in this system. The term "correctional" facility is a misnomer. Any real growth must come from personal, internal measures and religion is a path chosen by many as a way to find peace. So, let's limit the opportunities and resources for using that as a tool, even if it does not even cost money to the system.

I myself currently has seven books on Buddhism and yoga, add a thesaurus and a few reference books for the novel I'm working on and I cannot receive any more books. This obviously will make me a better and more responsible human when I finally get out.

This brings me to a second, and related oddity. I currently have two books in "property" that are considered "contraband" as they came (from Amazon) without receipts. This happens with incredible frequency to the point where it seems that Amazon sends a full third of their shipments without receipts. If or when the receipts are mailed to us by the person who ordered the material, we can and then pick them up. If that is, they are from Amazon "proper" and not a third party vendor through Amazon marketplace, in which case we can send them back, or to someone else ( at our own expense), or donate them to our library where we can check them out if they are available.

Of course, there is no record of who actually sends the gifts, so I must play detective by mail to discover the benevolent soul who sent the gifts and then ask them to deal with more hassles. Ironically the two contraband books are both of the spiritual and "self help" nature. "God" forbid I get a hold of such destructive literature.

Part II: Visitation Vagaries

My children pulled a surprise visit on me just the other day, which was of course wonderful, as always. There were also a couple of examples of ludicrous policy that occurred during the visit.

First, I was finally able to get the "Veterans Day" photos that had been ordered more than two months ago. I tried on previous occasions to get the photos taken which are theoretically done to allow us to send them as holiday gifts. The first time I tried, I was told by the officer in charge that the digital camera was out of film. I swear I'm not making this up. The next time it was "too busy" in visitation.

So, this time the camera had "film", and I went to lift up my kids so they'd be roughly at head level with me. Apparently, that is not allowed. Then for the third and final picture --I paid for three, never mind that I expected that meant three copies of the same pose -- we decided to make silly faces. Apparently, that's not allowed. So my son tried to give me a bunny ears. Yep, you guessed it, apparently that's not allowed.

I've spent a good deal of brainpower puzzling over the rationality behind this one. One possible reason might be related to why we must remain clean shaven at all times - to match the appearance on our photo IDs. (Though our hair length has no such restrictions.) So if I were to escape, and someone might see me, they'd look at the picture from visitation (yeah right) and say, "well, that does look like the guy I seen, 'cept he didn't have no bunny ears so it couldna been him."

Or perhaps it might be considered a sign of irreverence or disrespect to all our powerful ADC overlords. It all seems rather nonsensical and mysterious.

The other incident during visitation with the kids occurred after they had decided to make a giant face in the dirt in the outdoors area of visitation. This is something we frequently do when they visit, I'm not sure why, but they like it and that's all that matters to me.

Anyway, this time they decided to fill in some of the facial features with the pebbles that are piled along the perimeter. There are signs posted to remain 2 feet from defense, which are generally ignored by all, including the kids as they gathered pebbles. Eventually, the visitation officer came out and asked us not to do that anymore as he didn't want to get in trouble. OK, fair enough. But then he asked us to return the pebbles to where they came from, which meant going back into the "forbidden danger zone". Perhaps there should be an investigation into the "guiding philosophical nature of the ADC". Descartes, Aristotle, and Socrates combined could not make sense of it all.

Part III: Medical Mayhem

The last of my rants for the day and is far less amusing, and really quite tragic. It has to do with the incredible lack of care, concern, nd common sense of the Medical System of the ADC.

As previously mentioned, at present there is a class action suit against the state for failure to provide basic, adequate medical care. I could fill an entire book with stories that I've heard, but I'll limit myself to a few scenarios that I have experience with myself, so I know them to be factual.

Since the lawsuit's genesis, the ADC has "farmed out" its Health Care to a private company called Wexford. I suspect that decision is related to the lawsuit, but I really don't know for certain. Anyway, the incredible result is even worse access to basic, adequate health care.

Within the class action suit are several instances of dental malpractice. I have recently been experiencing a toothache and decided to go to dental, to see what they said. I submitted a Health Needs Request (HNR), and amazingly received a pass to the dentist within a week. I had to take a day off of work only to have the dentist not show up and all appointments canceled. A week later, I got another appointment. The dentist looked in my mouth and banged on a tooth with a sharp pointed solid steel implement of destruction and asked if it hurt. "Well, yes, it does," I replied. He informed me that that it needed to be pulled. I suggested perhaps a filling instead. "No, no, it's too deep for that, on the outside you could get a root canal, but we don't do that here." Now I've never heard of dentists making such a prognosis with a 2 minute peek and a rap on a tooth. I said I'd like to consider my options, not relishing having a tooth ripped out of my jaw. "That's fine," he said and made me sign a "refusal of treatment" form, effectively relieving him of any and all responsibilities or consequences.

Another all too common scenario that seems to be escalating in frequency is a sudden and inexplicable cessation of medications. I receive meds for high blood pressure, high cholesterol, and an antidepressant. Last month, the cholesterol meds were not refilled. A new policy in place since Wexford took over is that we cannot talk to the medical staff about any medical issues, we must submit an HNR. So, after two weeks of no word on my meds, I sent an HNR requesting either a refill or an explanation as to why they were discontinued. The letter came back with a nurse's initials, I assume to confirm it had been received. But there was no explanation, plan, or even a comment on the content of the letter.

In speaking with other inmates, this too seems to be fairly common. One good friend has had his heart meds stopped for two months, he has sent three HNRs and has not gotten a reply to any of them. Others have shared such tales, and even more ludicrous ones, of doctors blatently refusing to see patients with legitimate health concerns. Blood tests are frequently given, but the results are never shared, nor are any problems in the lab work actually acted upon. The staff seems to go to extremes to avoid actually addressing concerns. It seems that Wexford offers more training on avoidance than on medical treatment.

As the number of inmates and the sentences of incarceration continue to increase, the logical place to cut costs is by neglecting basic medical care. After all, we are nothing but a bunch of monsters, whose lives are of little concern or value to society as a whole. Refraining from medical treatment is a cheap and easy way to make room for the next batch of prisoners. Though it would be even more efficient and quicker to just put us in a gas chamber. There's a policy that would make some sense.

Incarceration Inequality

I had a discussion with another inmate recently. We were talking about how inmates on minimum security yards are able to work on the "outside" for minimum wage. This is around 15 times more per hour than we can possibly earn on this medium security yard.

Sex offenders (SOs) can never move "up" in security clearance regardless of crime, or behavior while incarcerated. Yet, the vast majority of those here are convicted of non-violent crimes, and many, like myself, have "non contact" charges as well.

Many correctional officers have admitted to me that the SO yards are far less violent than the general population (GP) yards. The Arizona Dept. of Corrections will periodically switch the designations of yards, and swap inmates around so that the SO's can "clean up" the messes left behind by the GPs.

So how is it that the "system" recognizes this on the one hand, yet continues to subdue this class of felons on the other?

I think about how, had I stabbed, robbed, or beaten someone, I'd be able to provide more for my kids, ex wife, and ex-fiancé than I can at present. It's sad that the families of SOs are subject to the similar inequalities and persecutions as the inmates themselves.

Of course it can be said that I should have considered that before downloading illegal porn. That I did not realize the inequities of the correctional system is a paltry excuse, and I regret that decision every moment of everyday. But is that any less true for someone who decides to knock off a liquor store? The kids and families are no less innocent, or no less important in either situation, yet the consequences for them are quite different.

The inconsistencies and inequalities seem to be capricious and unfounded. These topics need consideration, research, awareness, and publicity.

Prison Efficiency

On this, my last day in the building maintenance course, I had a typically interesting morning. The general rule of thumb is that we are supposed to be "called out" for school, work, chow, meds, and whatnot. For some reason, they rarely ever call out my CAC building class. So I have devised several ways to "escape" from my run and get to class on time. Well, as usual, I got out this morning and was at the gate between yards to go to class. The cantankerous cop asked where I was going, and I told her.  

"They haven't called you out yet," she said to me.

"They never call us out," said I.
"Yes they do, if you would just wait in your run, you would hear them, now get back home and wait until you are called."

"Yes ma'am," I said.

Of course, they didn't call. By this time I was late, and I asked the CO in my run if we had class. Twice. He couldn't be bothered to pick up his radio and ask. Eventually, breakfast was called, so I went back up to the gate. I asked the same cantankerous cop if there was CAC. She did bother to pick up a radio, this time, and call to the class.

"Did you call for CAC?" she asked.

"Negative," came the crackly response.

"Is a teacher there, are there students there?"

"Affirmative," came the reply.

So she gave me a dirty look, and said "wait by the fence," as if I were the one who messed up. she made no apology or even acknowledgement that she had sent me back, telling me that they "always" call for class.

I got through the fence, but of course the classroom area was locked, so I waved through the window. Eventually, the instructor shuffled out and gruffly said "would you explain why you're half an hour late?" So I punched him. 

Oh, wait, that was just my fantasy. I explained, he let me in, and then the TA said, "good thing you're here, otherwise I'd have to giving you a zero"-- meaning 0 hours for zero "pay". Then I asked him if I could take my final exam. "No, we are getting sent home in a few minutes." And we were.

So, on the plus side, I will get paid my 75¢ for the day, but on the minus side, I have to go through all of it again… tomorrow.